You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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