Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
