someone get that fucking seahorse.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
