Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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