I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
