You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
