Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
