No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
