he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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