I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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