Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I just blew my weed a kiss
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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