Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
