Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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