just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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