Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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