im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
