My friends, they love my intelligence
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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