Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
her vagine was all disorganized.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Fuck me I smell like cheese
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
