i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
