Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
