Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
