when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
