I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
