Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
