Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
You may now shotgun with the bride
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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