You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
