hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
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