billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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