I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
