Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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