He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
