He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
