as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
