He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Randomize
