Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
