It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
