how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
