so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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