it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
