Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
vagina is talking i cant
it was like having sex with a tree stump
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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