I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
