We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
