I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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