i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
