Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm sobbing to NWA
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
