I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
