I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
