I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
