I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
