What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
